We all know a guy. Or have him in our circle of influence.
Sometimes we love him. Sometimes we can’t stand him.
And either way, love em’ or hate em’, it’s all because of his penchant to be, what we call, ” a big bullshitter.”
You can’t believe a word he says.
Sitting around the campfire and embellishing a few fishing stories is one thing, but having a “story” for everything, that just so happens “tops” anyone else’s, who happens to be sitting around the same campfire, just ruins the vibe.
Most of the time our manliness is revealed by what we say.
But the deeper wounds are caused by what we don’t say.
I’ve found it’s hard to be encouraging, equipping, and engaging with men my own age, or older. They don’t want to see it, and definitely don’t want to hear it. And they absolutely refuse, to say it, in any meaningful mature way.
It’s that attitude that is helping to thin the herd of fully mature men, like an old .50 cal Sharps buffalo gun, plugging away at those big shaggys, back in 1877, keeping your distance, and your mouth shut… is damaging, deadly even.
We don’t communicate with each other. We don’t communicate with our families. We don’t communicate with the next generation of young men coming up, instead leaving them to their own immature devices… gaming and otherwise.
A critical point of communication is with our own sons.
We need to learn to identify those things happening inside of us, by using very specific words. What kind of angry are you? Are you sad, grieving, or just melancholy? Happy, joyful, or just feeling good?
Have you told your family. Out loud, “I love you?”
Specific words, and phrases, help us to become more intentional as men.
When we are immature. And sometimes when we think we are mature, and we come up against someone who wants to “talk” and “communicates” his message with words we are uncomfortable with… we can feel our blood start to boil, even if we do know better.
It takes a man to control himself to benefit from such a conversation.
And an EMERGING MAN to engage in such a conversation.
Being a man of few words is a good goal.
Just be sure the few words you do utter… are uttered specifically, with intent, and with purpose. Helping to ENCOURAGE, EQUIP, & ENGAGE.